when it comes to indulgence
by swallowedminds
Summary: Strong T. Picks up right at the end of Cops and Robbers. She kisses him. Three times. Two-shot. Now Complete.
1. Chapter 1

"I had such a great time, Castle. Thank you for this." She smiles that wide eyed smile, all teeth and happiness and dare he hope love radiating from her. The whole evening was pleasant. Kate fits in with his family as if she's been a part of it since the beginning.

"Thank you for saving my life. And mothers."

"That's what partners do," she chuckles, the amount of wine she consumed putting her voice at a higher intonation than normal. It's adorable and suits her in a way he'd never expect. "No need to keep thanking me."

The entire dinner they ignored the elephant in the room, their interrupted moment hanging between them with every flick of her eyes and every accidental touch.

She pulls her bottom lip in between her teeth and locks gazes with him from across the couch. Her glass sitting nearly empty in her loose palm and he wonders how she's getting home.

"You know," he starts, his voice low as if they're sharing a secret. "You could stay here tonight. Take the guest room and sleep off all this wine."

"I'm not drunk, Castle. If that's what you're implying." And suddenly it looks like the same moment they shared in a hotel room across the country. The desire for her is still strong, growing into something he no longer can control.

"No. Just want to make sure you're safe."

"I'll catch a cab." She stands then, unwrapping her endless legs from under herself to stretch. She stretches up, not out, and her shirt slowly rides up her stomach; it exposes a flat, pale plane of skin that he wishes he could touch. He wants to run his finger over all of it, swirl it around her belly button and feel her skin meld with his.

She pulls the shirt down before he can go too far in his fantasy.

Kate steps into her heels she tossed behind the couch and he retrieves her coat from the chair in the dining room.

"Do you think you'll be okay without me?" she teases as she turns so he can help her with her coat.

"No, without you I'm hopeless," he replies, pulling her hair from her collar after she puts her arms through the sleeves. When she turns to face him, her eyes have glazed over and her mouth is a rueful smile.

"I'm really glad you're alive."

"Me too." He shoves his hands in his pockets and looks at her shyly, knowing he's blushing.

Kate sighs then, the only time he's ever seen her whole body deflate with it, her shoulders sagging, and her muscles practically giving out.

And then without moving her feet Kate slams her face into his, only her mouth lands on his and the weight from her body keeps her there.

Her eyes are squeezed shut tight and she lets out a long "_mmmmm_" before she realizes what she's doing and abruptly pushes him away. But because her entire body was leaning into him, pushing him away almost makes her fall over. She catches herself by his shoulders, but when he meets her eyes they're wide with horror.

"I'm so sorry."

He wants to ask what she's sorry for. She can kiss him whenever she'd like, but she's covering her mouth and heading towards the door before he can even fully process what's happened.

"Kate," he calls, but she doesn't respond. He grabs her by the elbow and pulls her to meet his eye before she can reach the door and then her lips are back on his before he can ask her what made her do it.

Her hands are in his hair and she's clinging to him as if he's her only life source. He wraps his arms around her middle, his fingers clawing into her back, itching to touch her soft, pale skin. He groans when her pelvis knocks into his and she does a slow grind against him, her chest meshing with his. He wants to lift her up, have those sinful legs wrap around him and-

She's pulling away. His entire body goes rigid from cold air she leaves in her wake.

"Kate, what are we doing?"

"Something we shouldn't be. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that. Goodnight Castle."

Kate continues stalking off towards the door. It takes her while to realize that the reason it won't open is because he's got his hand holding it closed.

She lays her head against the coolness of the door and he crowds behind her. The heat of their bodies mixing together, joining them as one.

"Kate," he whispers, desperate for her to face him. He needs to see she won't regret this, that this won't be something that they just decide to forget about.

When she faces him her eyes are sorrowful, but she kisses him again. And this time it's him who sighs.

He could get use to this. The heat of her mouth, the dancing of their tongues, the singing of their hearts. She's magic, like fireworks and flowers on a rainy day.

Her arms are secure around his neck and so he places his hands under her thighs and lifts her, which aligns, _ahem_, their _parts_ perfectly. He growls when she arches her back and takes his lip between her teeth, making his knees go weak, and he pushes her harder into the door. His palms are sweaty and his heart, dear God, his heart is beating so quickly it might just give out.

She's killing him, killing him with these too sexy sounds and her soft, full lips, and _fuck_ her body is just everything he needs. She fits against him like they're the last two pieces of a jigsaw puzzle.

"Cas- Castle we need to sta- stop, mmm." She pulls away to speak, but his lips find her neck and then his tongue peaks out to taste her creamy skin and she's back to moaning. Her butt cheeks are clenching tighter and tighter against his palms and her thighs are quaking. Kate's breathing is getting out of control and with nowhere to run all she can do is give in.

"Do you wanna stop?" he husks, kissing her jaw and squeezing her thighs.

"No!" she squeaks, panting and she rests her head in defeat against the door. "I want you."

She looks him dead in the eye then, her expression serious, but her eyes are filled with desire, raw and _wet_. "God, I want you," she repeats latching her mouth back to his.

Heat runs from the tops of his head down to his shaft at her words, tripling his longing for her. And wow, he's so in love with her, he never wants this moment to end, wants to have her body aligned with his for the rest of his life.

"Take me to bed, Ca-"

"Hey, Dad I-"

_Shit_. "Alexis?"

"Putmedown, Castle," Kate practically mumbles, speaking to fast.

"OHMYGOD. I'm sorry!" Alexis yells before slapping a hand over her eyes. "I didn't see anything." She bounds back up the stairs before anyone can speak.

Castle looks at Beckett, whose face is flushed and is still breathing as if she only has one lung.

"Kate I still-"

"I should go. Really this time."

If she leaves now, his heart won't be able to take it. But she kisses him goodnight, a quick peck on his mouth before racing out the door.

He stands stunned for half a second before following her out the loft. She's stepping into the elevator when he stops her, is able to yell through the doors before they close on him.

"This happened, Kate. We won't forget it."

She just looks forlorn when the doors do finally close and he's left standing alone.

* * *

_Just a little something I was forced to write :P I hope you all enjoyed it nonetheless._


	2. Chapter 2

**I actually had this written when I wrote the first chapter and forgot about it :/ Sorry. But since most of you asked, here it is! All mistakes are mine.**

* * *

What the fuck was she thinking?

Kissing Castle last night was the stupidest thing she could've done. But damn it, it felt so good. _He_ felt good.

Kate sits at her desk in the precinct trying to get this paperwork done. This is day three in week two without a case to distract her from her tempting partner. Last night, Kate foolishly indulged in a taste test that would've developed into a full-fledged feeding had Alexis not interrupted them.

Maybe that was a bad analogy, but the idea is the same.

With every ding of the elevator Kate stiffens, afraid of the moment it'll be her partner walking up to her. He said last night wouldn't be something they forgot about, and if she knows Castle at all is that he's true to his word.

It's not as if she wants to forget, she just doesn't want to talk about it, scared that it'll bring up certain words said to her while she lay dying.

And of course last night she'd dreamt that it all happened together. His whispered words _I love you, Kate_ were against her neck while he pumped in and out of her, sending her body in a fit of sizzles, hot and wanting, quivering with anticipation. Kate woke up this morning breathing as hard as she had against his door, skin sticky with sweat, and her core slick and throbbing with need.

Her lips are still tingling. She keeps rubbing her finger over her bottom lip, can feel his lips against hers even now; even when he bit her lip back. She showered for an hour last night so her skin didn't feel like he was still touching her. There'd be no way she could sleep with the phantom of his touch lingering and turning her on all night.

Would she have regretted it?

She knows when she talks to Burke later today that he'll have a field day with this.

"Penny for your thoughts?" Castle asks and it startles her out of her reverie. He sets a coffee cup down in front of her.

"Hi!" She greets too loudly. "Good morning. Thank you for this." She gestures to the coffee.

"No problem."

Before this conversation can turn serious Kate continues talking.

"What're you doing here? Shouldn't you be home? Alexis was so worried about you yesterday, I'm surprised she let you out her sight."

"Alexis is a big girl. She'll be alright."

She watches him roll his lips and get comfortable in his chair before his eyes settle back on her. Kate can see the beginnings of a smirk forming on his face and she knows what's coming before he even opens his mouth.

"So how was your night? Sleep okay?"

He sounds so innocent but she won't be fooled.

"Fine, thanks." She turns back to her paperwork and tries not to watch his hands. The Castle in her dreams can do so much with his fingers and from the way she's seen him write and type on his phone, she has no doubt the Castle next to her wouldn't be too.

"I couldn't sleep last night. Not until I could...," he clears his throat, lowering his voice and the timbre causes the hairs on the back of her neck stand. "Relieve some tension I was feeling."

Oh, God.

Kate feels her entire body heat up at his words, her face flushing a deep crimson, and she sits wide eyed for a minute before she can compose herself. This man is going to ruin her.

She clears her throat and angles her body away from him. "As long as you got some sleep," she replies, her voice stern and indifferent.

"Kate, I want you to remember that _you_ kissed _me_ last night."

"I know that." Kate's voice sharpens, her intonation higher because she feels offended.

"So stop acting like I was the one who crossed the line."

"If I didn't want to kiss you, I wouldn't have!" She seethes while trying to keep her voice down. The last thing this situation needs is the boys overhearing them talk about kissing. "I had a lot to drink. I wasn't myself."

Castle doesn't reply, just sinks further into his seat and keeps his eyes on her. "Can I ask you a question?"

Kate doesn't trust her voice not to crack so she just nods her head, but keeps her eyes on her computer screen.

"Would you take it back? If you could take everything that happened after you stood to leave back, would you?"

"No," she answers, her voice timid and weak.

"Why not?"

"CASTLE." Kate sees Ryan and Espo look in her direction at that, decides to try to calm her racing heart before speaking again. She's showing too much emotion and she hasn't even finished her first cup of coffee yet. "I don't want to talk about this."

Kate stands from her desk and heads to the restroom, the only place she knows she'll be safe from his dangerous proximity and revealing questions.

Once there, she splashes cold water on her face and lets her hair down, trying to cool down her heated skin.

She stares at her white washed face for what feels like hours contemplating, how to proceed with this whole _she kissed castle and he wants to talk about it thing._

If she had left like she planned to, none of this would have happened. But she doesn't regret it. In fact, she wished Alexis never interrupted them. But she asked Castle to wait for her, she needs more time to knock down this wall because had last night moved to his bedroom, she would've dived in before she was ready. And walking away from him after finally getting what they both have been longing for would be the hardest thing she would ever have to do. Last night was sneak peek, a special preview to see exactly what they're waiting for. And it's so worth it.

They just need to wait a little longer.

She just has to put a tighter lid on her arousal, tamp down her need for him. This means she needs to get rid of him for a few hours so this thing between them can begin to dissipate. The worst thing that can happen is they sleep together and she still isn't ready to open up to him, or he doesn't want her afterward. What if this tension is all they've got? She needs this time to knock down her wall, so there are no questions or doubts about her feelings.

When she walks back out into the bull pen, Castle is talking to the boys about something that must be really funny because Ryan is doing that laugh silently thing and his face looks like it might pop. She grabs her coffee from her desk and goes to take a sip; it's cold.

Heading back to the break room she sees Castle look in her direction before turning back to the boys. If she can figure out how to work the damn machine, she can make a fresh cup and be out before he can think about coming in after her.

That is, until she hears the sound of his footsteps coming after to her and turns to find him there, watching her intently.

He says nothing when they're alone and she tries to ignore him. But the second he closes the break room door all the air is sucked out of the room.

Kate can hear her heart pounding in her ears; feel her palms begin to sweat. The temperature sky rockets and it's taking everything in her not to make a sound or any sudden movements. If he comes after her, she might not have the resistance to hold back from him. He's everything she's wanted for years now. And here he is, after months of waiting still wanting her.

Maybe it's okay to indulge, just a little.

No. That's not fair to him.

God, her mind is all messed up.

Kate turns and faces the coffee machine, determined to just ignore him, but then suddenly his hand is there at the small of her back and his mouth is at her ear. Shivers race down her spine and she closes her eyes. Damn it, damn it, damn it.

"Need some help with that?" he husks in her ear, his hand tightening around her waist. She wants him to move his hand a little higher, squeeze a little tighter.

"Shu-sure, yeah."

"You just have to remember to be patient. Take your time to love it. Rushing won't get you a satisfying cup."

He keeps his body pressed firmly against her back as he shows her how to work the machine. The warmth from his chest seeping deep into her skin, setting her body on fire, and if she doesn't get some space right now her body is going to give away all her secrets. She wants him, _desperately_. It's an ache that formed when they first met and instead of leaving, it settled deep within her core; it's always starting fires inside her, refusing to let any flame die out.

"The slower you go, the hotter is gets, the richer is tastes."

Oh, God. He needs to stop talking. He needs to stop talking right now. His voice is doing all kinds of things to her. Her eyes close on their own volition and she leans her head back to rest on his shoulder, completely powerless to his seductive tone.

"Watch, Kate," he whispers against her ear. His lips nibbling her skin, working his way down her neck.

She has to bite her lip to stop herself from moaning.

"Tell me why, tell me why you don't regret last night." He wraps both hands fully around her middle. His fingers dance on the edge of her shirt, daring to touch her skin. Kate's muscles contract and she knows she's giving herself away now, but can't bring herself to remember why indulging is a bad idea.

"Tell me, Kate."

Her throat closes up and she mewls. He can't expect her to be able to think while he's touching her like this, igniting new flames that are going to keep her up at night until she has to get herself off on the thought of him.

"I-I…" His hands mess with the buttons on her slacks, threatening to open them so he can slip his hand down her pants. Her entire body is under attack from the fire down below and if he doesn't relieve something she's going to combust.

"I can wait, Kate. I told you I would. But I need some type of reassurance. Tell me why you don't regret it, please."

_Because I love you_

It would be so easy to just say it. But her throat is still closed up from her arousal. And suddenly she is so scared to ruin this that she takes his hands off her body and turns to face him. His eyes are dark orbs of desire, dedicating themselves to only her. Oh, how much she would love for those eyes to rake over her body, heightening her pleasure.

"That wall you're working on? When it comes down-"

"I want you there," Kate whispers, her eyes never leaving his mouth as she speaks.

Castle smiles then, all bright eyes and dimpled lips. "I'll be there. That's all I wanted." He steps into her then, holds her hands as he leans in and kisses her gently on the lips.

Kate's ready to pounce now, to have all him right here, right now, but he's pulling away all too soon, leaving her breathless, aching.

"Coffee's ready." He smirks and the butterflies in her belly continue to flutter wildly, while the ones in her pants are clenching tight.

It's time to knock down this damn wall.

* * *

**Thanks for reading :)**


End file.
